just be it Just Be It is a practice of presence that recognizes the limits of language. When aware of silence there is a state of inner still alertness. You are wholeheartedly present.

We can move unconsciously or consciously. We can wake up or stay asleep. When we move from heart knowing rather than head knowing, compassion, gratitude and forgiveness thrive. When we expand our notions of belonging, breaking the illusion of our separateness, we discover the true motivation to ‘not harm’. In compassion, we discover how our courage to meet another’s suffering is really our awareness to their suffering met as our suffering. Our spiritual mandates are:

1.Forever work to expand your circle of belonging. Where we stop growing these circles is where our violence begins. Violence is the robbing of opportunity. Wherever we oppress or rob another of opportunity, we’re ‘missing the mark’, the definition of sin.
2. Growth is humbling oneself to ’not knowing’, to engage the curious mind, forever open to surprise. The divine is too big to ever think we have all the answers. Yet, the head or conceptualizing mind is continually trying to convince us ‘we know’. Our deepest faith and hope would have us move to a different kind of knowing that’s fed from the heart. It’s a consciousness that will forever have us in an open, curious posture. It recognizes how real learning comes from an open mind that always asks deeper questions. Our ignorance settles in when we move from the ‘I know that’ mind, the mind unwilling to explore. This mind humbles itself in stillness/silence, essentially using the mantra, “I admit the mystery is big and I don’t know everything”.
3. The spiritual journey mandates we surrender in silence to hear the divine. If effect, the Word is found in the gap between the words. The mandate is “Be still and know I am God”. We can function in thought/language or rise above thought. We function in language or go below thought and language with drugs, tv, games, etc., numbing ourselves to the moment of experience. Or, we can go above thought/language, in silence, to that space before thought. This requires resolve to practice.
4. Practice more, speak less. Become more aware of the precious nature of the moment. Increase attention, relax and accept what presents, appreciate by finding the gift in the given, deepen with allowing, and ultimately move to affection as we break the illusion of our division. This is the essence of a centering practice. As with anything, what we put attention to grows stronger. The more we practice, the more aware we become. The more aware we become the more we grow our desire to ease suffering, to minimize the harm we cause. Ironically, many have called this ‘mindfulness’, when in reality, when we go above thought, we’re practicing ‘mind emptiness’. It’s a place of peace and feeling of ‘great fullness’.

The core of any contemplative practice will lead one to the ‘practice of stillness’. The core of movement in the spiritual journey will always ask for surrender to the unknown. Pema Chodron has written a book entitled Embracing Uncertainty which beautifully addresses this. As we progress to consciousness, moving from sleep to awake, we grow our confidence in meeting what comes up. Just as in the Quaker tradition, we speak when the heart has a downloaded message from the divine. We hold silence when our ego is driving our speech from thoughts of ‘knowing’ fed from greed, fear and the illusion of our separateness. The heart knows when to stand up and when to bow down. The growing awareness of this is the center of the spiritual journey.

Whether we voted for Hillary, Donald, a third party candidate, or were part of the 50% who didn’t even vote, the vast majority of voters were protesting a broken, dysfunctional system in dire need of an upgrade. Change is accelerating at an amazing speed and we simply don’t have time to stagnate in our capacity to adapt to it. Our small brains struggle with trying to make sense of complexities that are far beyond our egos solutions. We ‘think’ we can be on the winning side, when if fact, we all know the circle has no sides. The mystery is simply too big for us to ever think we have all the information. Some have said that our informational society doubles in what it knows each day. That means, what we’ve learned in history up to this moment is doubled due to the tremendous capacities of technological development. Yet, our juvenile mind seems to want to work from ‘knowing’ what’s right and what’s wrong. These small minds want to lock into fixed solutions for issues that are far beyond our thought. We end up pushing antiquated political agendas at our peril. We refuse to open to solutions that are bigger than us. We push science to validate our limited thinking rather than to discover new territory. We’re no longer the pilgrims we once were. We’re a society filled with fear and complaint and our country simply doesn’t function when that’s the driving force. So what can we do? My suggestion is to humbly acknowledge that we don’t know everything.

The famous Sufi mystic, Rumi, once wrote, “Out there, is a field. It’s a field beyond notions of right knowing and wrong knowing. Let’s meet there.” Our Declaration of Independence says that our true freedom relies upon the protection of divine Providence. There’s a deeper faith that’s far beyond our temptation to put complete trust in any political leader, party or branch of government. It begs us to come together, in humility and dedicated service, to “mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor”. There’s a sense of stewardship from knowing ‘we don’t know’ and the quality of our living is dependent upon this pledge to our interdependence. When we sit silently in the field of uncertainty we find our real grounding. It’s not in some political platform designed from special interest lobbyists. There’s little centering found in media that feeds on conflict. We can take religious beliefs from controlling our laws, but it’s an ugly picture when we take spirituality and the sacred out of politics. We must all come to ground and admit ‘we don’t know everything’. If we truly get the divine, we accept that we’re just beginning to touch the tip of the iceberg. When we do this we open to bigger solutions. We appreciate the failures of our past efforts to push our sense of rightness.

We’re all going through our spiritual journeys. We can read all of our spiritual texts advising a life of moderation. We all know we’re to love one another, even our perceived enemies. We’re all perplexed by the tremendous harm that’s come from the hoarding of wealth as we witness millions of children suffering from lack of food and shelter. We’re somehow caught in the illusion that we’re separate from one another. Yet, deep within us, we all know that when another dies from our recklessness, fear and greed, we also experience loss. So what can we do? I can’t change you. And my happiness is not dependent up on you. I can touch true freedom when I can let go my notions of blame, complaint and entitlement. The center and calm I create within my own mind calms and centers the world. So next time we meet, can we ask Rumi’s question? Can we spend our opening time by just admitting, “We don’t know everything”? Can we pay attention to one another, accept one another’s honor to ‘just be’, allowing one another to be carried by the thoughts we’ve been exposed to through our journey, appreciating our vast diversity, and ultimately, touching one another’s heart in stillness.

I guarantee that our world would progress more positively if our branches of congress could open all meetings with, “I admit that I don’t know everything. I honor your journey. I commit my life, fortunes and sacred honor to this endeavor. And acknowledging the mystery of divine Providence, I sit with stilled mind and speech, aiming to not cause harm in search of a bigger solution.”

As Donald would say, “Today’s problems are huge”. And when the problems are big, we have to get bigger than the problem and work from a higher vibration lest we be carried in ignorance to the promises of a narcissistic paternal leader who thinks he/she is God.

SAINT ROMUALD’S RULE

Sit in your cell as in paradise. Put the whole world behind you and forget it. Watch your thoughts like a good fisherman watching for fish. The path you must follow is in the Psalms—never leave it.

If you have just come to the monastery, and in spite of your good will you cannot accomplish what you want, take every opportunity you can to sing the Psalms in your heart and to understand them with your mind.

And if your mind wanders as you read, do not give up; hurry back and apply your mind to the words once more.

Realize above all that you are in God’s presence, and stand there with the attitude of one who stands before the emperor.

Empty yourself completely and sit waiting, content with the grace of God, like the chick who tastes nothing and eats nothing but what his mother brings him

It’s of human nature to suffer. No one escapes it, yet we often carry the illusion that others may suffer less. This can lead us to a victim mentality. From here, things go downhill. Our work is to allow the light to enter through the crack in the darkness. When we can let go our attachment to the wound we can grow our healing. It’s why we’re so inspired by those who’ve suffered such deep wounding, only to show us how to live with more vitality.

Today, my daughter-in-law and granddaughter are in Paris, one year after the night club terrorist attack. Their love meets the suffering of this special town. For several years after 9/11, I attended a conference in New York City called “Fearless”. It addressed how we move through such deep wounding and I felt extremely honored and privileged to be with those who had directly experienced such horrific events. I visited New Orleans a couple years after Katrina and was amazed at the power of music in revitalizing a community we all thought would die. I played my horn at Virginia Tech in a healing ceremony one week after the mass shootings. I have a neighbor who witnessed my cracking moment upon learning of a son’s life threatening disease. He met me in silence. Recently, we experienced an election of extreme division. He was on one side and I on the other. We don’t know who really lost, but again, he’s willing to meet my deep suffering. We’ve had friends we’ve hospiced through painful deaths as we met their suffering and inevitable release. And I’ve had friends where it was too much to meet their suffering. Maybe you’re one of them, and I apologize. I work with prisoners to hopefully alleviate some of their suffering. We teach them how to put attention to the gift of the present moment by focusing on breath and stillness. Many return week after week and report on a more successful week with reduced suffering. Many don’t return.

I know my attachment to negative emotions seldom, if ever, helps. And I’ve seen how a small light can fill a room of darkness. Our spiritual mandate seems to be that of joy, of no complaining or blaming. Yet, our mind is restless. When faced with ‘this’, we want ‘that’. One of my greatest life challenges is to say, “I’m here. I want to be here.” Yet, in the face of suffering, there’s a continual thought of “I want to be back there”, “I want it different”, “I’m afraid about what’s coming”, etc. We’ve had human icons who’ve faced suffering with capacity I can’t begin to imagine. These Mother Teresa’s show us what’s possible. Yet, even she knew when the extreme suffering she encountered grew negative emotion it was time for rest. My wife has worked as a hospice volunteer, sitting with imminent death. The desire to fix is no more. There’s simply a desire to ‘be’ with the other, receiving the other’s transition as our own transition. The most eloquent example of holding joy in the face of extreme suffering comes from Dietrich Bonhoeffer, a Lutheran minister imprisoned in the death camps of Nazi Germany. One prisoner was puzzled by Bonhoeffer’s ability to hold a smile in the face of such atrocity. Finally he asked him how he could manage to do this. Bonhoeffer pointed to the guard assigned with leading people to the gas chambers and said, “I’m filled with gratitude that I’m not him”. Finding the gift in the given is what gives us strength to move, to hold our center, to meet one another’s suffering beyond the realm of our mind’s division.

The ultimate skill is to deepen our compassion for each other. Can we meet one another’s suffering in full presence? Where do we lose our center? Where do we find refuge in gaining strength to deepen our courage in this work? It’s essentially a question of, “Where do we show up and do our best?”

Throughout life, we can be knocked down or thrown off balance. We think things are going one way and then, puff, events take another turn. We say, “The rug was pulled from beneath us” or “I was knocked off my feet”, or “It was like getting kicked in the gut”. Our sense of control or ‘knowing’ is completely undermined as inexplicable events unfold before us. We have several choices at this moment. We can resist and push back. We can run, trying to bury our awareness to what’s happening. Or we can wake up. In effect, we move from fight or flight and arrive to that which is bigger. I like the phrase, “When the problem seems big, get bigger than the problem”.

Last night our country elected Donald Trump as our president. He ran a campaign that fed on our fears, anger and sense of separation from the rest of the world. He has promised to build walls, to ignore how we damage the environment, pushing the notion of America’s dominant strength in the world. We all face the poisons of fear, anger and the illusions of our separateness. Pluralism is something that challenges our sense of knowing. It’s easy to get caught up into thinking we can somehow turn back the hands of time. Mr. Trump’s campaign was built upon anger and complaint. It’s a reactive state that fails to recognize the importance of a centering practice. If someone pushes on us, then we push back on them. It’s ego and pride driven rather than moving from spiritual grounding. A centering practice asks us to “stop, look, and then move”. It recognizes the spiritual nature of all things and beings. It pledges to only take actions that come from the grounding of the central spiritual theme, “Love one another as yourself because you are each other.”

When I woke this morning to hear of the election result I buckled over. My stomach tightened and I felt a massive drop in vibratory energy. My mind quickly went to fear and anger about the future of our country and planet. I was caught in thoughts of despair. This is where I’ve come to find great value in dedicated centering practices. It was absolutely necessary to heal through this pain with various consciousness practices. The sky was blue and spacious. The sun was shining and there were still a few birds singing. During meditation it took tremendous resolve to let depressing thoughts go as I returned to breath awareness. During yoga practice I had to embrace those who voted for Trump as me. We are one, beyond notions of separation. Filling my heart with compassion for their suffering and my broken heart, I was somehow better able to find center. These practices are healing. They help us awake in consciousness to the fantasy of our divided minds.

No matter how you voted, I can’t stress enough the importance of developing a solid centering practice. In these times of rapid change, the cultivation of stability on an unstable platform becomes increasingly important to our health as a family and planet. Develop a practice where you become more aware of how thoughts grow emotion. When we water the seeds of fear and anger we suffer more. When we water the seeds of gratitude, joy, kindness and compassion, the vibration rises and we heal.

I’m intending to do what I can to move more and more to “no complaint, no complaint”, in gratitude for the opportunity to ‘just be’. It means I’m perhaps best to hold my words while this wounding is so deep. We have all entered the ‘land of I don’t know’ and we’re in for one very interesting ride. If we can dedicate to holding our center, waking to consciousness, and loving one another, deep down, we all know that’s what we’re here for.

I recall a yoga instructor telling us that depth isn’t as important as the grace in which we move in and out of our postures. The Law of Least Effort advises us to move in resonance to what is from a deeper listening. From here there’s a fluid movement that gracefully takes us to the edge where we meet our balanced posture in stillness. It’s the same with any performance. When we let go and allow, trusting in that which is bigger than our concept of self (ego), the dance reveals itself in harmony and perfect alignment. The word ‘grace’ is related to ‘gratitude’ not only by the first three letters, but by a meaning that opens us to a bigger belonging. Rather than ‘trying’ to accomplish something, we surrender to a new ground that’s supported in a way we can’t describe in words. It’s where the real music is found.

We don’t have to be a well trained performer to see this. It’s naturally obvious to most of us when someone is feigning the passion in their performance. Last Saturday night Lady Gaga, a huge talent, broke with grace when she clumsily moved from hat on to hat off in her performance. The rigidity of movement was also seen in her movement to sitting on top of the piano. Her voice was impeccable, yet her capacity to blend movement with voice was hampered by the resistance to let go. So how do we get to that point of grace? With practice. Our life practice is our practice and it’s how she got to the point she’s at in performance. Rehearsal with resolve brings us to the point where we can surrender and let go to grace. Yesterday I was windsurfing with a friend who got caught in a huge gust. His sail contorted, the board went up on it’s tail, and he was close to complete loss of control. Had he not had thousands of hours of sailing experience, he would have blown up. With grace, new ground is discovered that allows us to go to our edge, just past what we had conceived as possible. When I’m performing with our blues band it’s now undeniable when I’m surrendered in grace to the moment and when I’m caught in my concept of self. The audience knows this and enters the space as well. The barrier created in my mind of ‘us vs. them’ is gracefully and humbly released to something bigger.

So how many political speeches have you heard that are filled with grace? This campaign cycle has seemed to be worse than others for it’s violence. Or maybe we’re waking up to the ineffectiveness of disgraceful campaigns. Michelle Obama seems to be the only one that has this somewhat figured out. A line she used, “When they go low, we go high”, has been frequently used in the campaign. Yet, going high means we stop complaining and move to the ground of faith, hope, and stewardship in meeting the demands of our rapidly changing world. It steps away from judgment with grace, humility and surrender to that which is bigger than all of us. It’s a turn of politics that moves from the profane to the sacred, from the secular to the spiritual, from ‘God plus fear’ to ‘God minus fear’. Our politics are defined by whether or not we feel the universe is safe or dangerous. A deeper, graceful approach recognizes that we are all interconnected, change happens, and our work is to seek understanding in finding the gift in what is. This felt sense of ‘great fullness’ comes from the sense of gift rather than from our ego’s sense of control and it’s need to ‘fix’ what’s broken. When we step into grace we have the courage to go deeper, to grow curiosity to bigger solutions, to move from monologue to dialogue, to move from argument to collaboration, to move without resistance to a ground of understanding that recognizes our need to support each other. When we step into the grace displayed by Gandhi it’s obvious to see how we need to ‘be peace’ rather than push peace. It’s obvious that when we attack others we attack ourselves. It’s why one of the great spiritual precepts is to ‘not speak ill of others’. It’s when the dominance of negative ads, complaint in politics, and argument have brought to such low levels in threatening our democracy.

Grace does not move from greed, fear or from the illusion of our separateness. It doesn’t come from that place of dissatisfaction or restlessness. It moves from our center, heart aligned with head, in balance to that bigger sense of belonging. A life practice of stilling our thinking mind, just letting thought and concept go, brings us to that place of grace. With resolve to lead a more graceful life we can practice breathing in, noticing where resistance lies, feeling the sensation, and then with awareness, letting go, stepping from our conceptualized notion of being a separated self. Some teachers have referred to this as the process of ‘self settling into Self’.

So where do you move from? From head or heart, with an open or closed mind, in curiosity or dogma, from fear or faith, from anger or love? Michelle Obama gave one of the most brilliant political speeches recently, simply by focusing on the word ‘maybe’. It stepped from the ground of absolute, dogmatic knowing to a questioning. No doubt, she’s political and she’s working within a political environment dramatically out of step with the times. Yet, she seems to be hospicing the death of these old world approaches to electing government officials. Check out her speech and see if you were moved. Was it filled with grace?

Who’s Your Real Provider?

I was taken by a recent video taken from the wisdom of former Supreme Court Justice, David Souter. He describes a dire turn for our country when we succumb to electing a leader who claims he can solve our problems and end our suffering. The notion of supporting someone because you ‘think’ they’re going to save you is filled with fear and doubt. True faith cultivates a ‘knowing’ that you’ve always been supported, you are supported and you always will be supported. It stands outside of time and space and resides deep in the heart. Touching this confidence comes from touching stillness beyond the limits of language and thought. It breaks the barrier of ‘thinking we’re separate’. In the film series ‘Breaking Bad’, the lead character is led to causing great harm and violence through his drive to ‘be the provider’. Today’s gross unequal dispersion of wealth is a result of those who would attempt to take the role of ‘provider’. Yet, our real faith comes in accepting this moment in it’s fullness with the full support of that which is bigger than us. When we surrender the cleverness of our thoughts and just sit with one another we’re humbled to the ground, filled with wonder for all that we don’t know. We strengthened to meet the unknown. We have the courage to meet one another in our joy and in our suffering. Our real provider is often named God, but since the meaning of the word is in the person, there are enough meanings for that name as there are people. The arrogant will push their meaning on others with a sense of being the ‘provider’ themselves. The human being will let go thoughts of knowing and allow the divine mystery to work through them. There we find freedom from thoughts of insufficiency, fears of punishment, judgment and shame. It’s where we find the precious moment in its transience and the peace and harmony of the divine mystery in all beings and things.

We’re living in momentous times where the wolf addresses the sheep in provider sheep clothing. The human desire to supplant God with their ‘doing’ and ‘saving’ results in political candidates like Donald Trump and leaders like Putin, Assad, Hitler, Mao, Pol Pot, and the list goes on. Their greed for power lifts them to power from the negative emotions of fear and anger. The overriding sentiment is one of division, being #1, and building walls. The ignorance of our inter dependence threatens our children, our environment and our very democracy. Our survival and thriving as a democracy depends upon our willingness to sit in stillness as we listen for direction from divine providence. This planet is so precious. Our children are precious. The very next breath we take is opportunity to express gratitude for the very gift of life. Real faith revolves around listening. It’s unfortunate that the skill of listening is not even on the table as today’s political campaigns revolve around the communicative element of expression, often to the point where they speak at the same time. Too bad, because it’s only through stilling the mind, looking at one another’s humanity with compassion, that we can secure our real security, touching the ground of a bigger provider.

The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.
H. L. Mencken

Yesterday I had a fascinating discussion with two very dear friends. One an amazing athlete, the other a life long body builder. They had just come from one of their first yoga classes and were amazed at the new challenges presented to them. Both of them contrasted the slower pace of the postures and the perceived difference of ‘static’ balance and ‘moving’ balance. I used to think this way, also. Yet, the more we practice these balance traditions, the more we see there is no such thing as static. Impermanence is always there and we only have the illusion of stopping. Whether in seated meditation or moving meditation practices like Vinyasa yoga or Tai Chi, there is always the next arising moment and the more refined our awareness the more we can see this. Just as the wave in form is always moving, our bodies never cease movement. The illusion of permanence and separateness forever become more obvious the more we practice.

Essentially, the more we practice the more we surrender concepts of our self (ego) and come into alignment with our center. In yoga, the term ‘asana’ means balanced posture. It doesn’t mean static or fixed posture. It has to do with depth. As we challenge balance in moving from four point, three point, two point, and eventually one legged postures, we’re forever refining our perceptual awareness of center. From a witness mind, we gently and safely wrap the poses around the breath. Perhaps we put awareness to changing sensations in the foot, or we witness thought streams coming and going (or maybe not going). By stabilizing the body in alignment we can go with awareness into the areas where the tension is or the emotion is. It’s mindful, slow and intimate. It’s a forever changing process where we open to something that can’t be defined or put into language. There’s a curiosity and joy in discovery as we challenge the further release of tension so we can show up in alignment to what’s coming up. These practices are tools that provide a spaciousness for inquiry. It breaks our addiction to tension, opens us, and allows insights to arise. There’s a vulnerability and surrender that move us from reason/logic of the head to the heart. Elkhart Tolle calls this place ‘above thinking’. Plato and Socrates called this place wisdom, the truth that I come to when I accept the fact that I know nothing.

Real balance is forever in movement from the heart. It’s bottomless and as a life long practice challenges us to hold our center in the face of cultural gravity. We come to hold all people’s journeys as sacred. We hold balance in our love for each other recognizing the trauma and suffering we all have to work through. It’s a process of committing to being bigger than who we ‘think’ we are. It’s what some have called the discovery of Self from self (ego). Real balance from the center breaks the illusion of separateness and permanence, opening us to the next emergency moment, ready to show up balanced, non-reactive, and poised to be our best. It’s why I like to think of life as the practice of cultivating our stability (awareness of center) on an unstable platform that’s forever moving. Our joy and success in life are directly related to our willingness to ‘wake up’ to this, to engage consciousness over unconsciousness, awareness over unawareness, and above thinking over under thinking. It’s about our willingness to be pilgrims to the unknown, centered in faith to that which is bigger than us, in joy for the very gift of the next moments mystery. This is the essence of ‘just be it’.

I once heard someone define vitality as fully meeting the present moment. I’ve also heard some psychologists define depression as a lack of vitality. When we’re fully engaged in the present moment, whole-heartedly giving all we have to this moment, we’re at our best. There’s an alignment with the inner and the outer, a place that’s a portal to something deeper than sense perception and our projection of personal self. We can step out of our story to be with the simplicity of the moment. There’s an aliveness and beauty to it where we can experience directly without needing the thought process to convince us. This alertness reveals itself as something very deep and it takes you from the story that has a heavy past or future. This place of full vitality is a discovery of the beauty of living, if you only live a little free from the story.

So leaving thought in wholehearted action is a stepping out of the story to ‘just be’ with the moment…to discover the aliveness of the moment. You see directly when you don’t bring in mental labels (language). Without the personal relationship, in that alertness, there is also a stillness. It frees you from you as the story based centered self. This moving from ‘thinking’ you’re somebody to experiencing fully the nonverbal takes you to the discovery of your ‘somebody else’. When you choose to be present without the interference of thought you have one foot in the un-manifest and this influences what does manifest. The way you experience the outer world is heavily influenced by the fact you’re rooted in the depths of your being…in the spaciousness and stillness of the present. At this moment love flows from the un-manifest into the world of form.

I recently watched the second presidential debate between Clinton and Trump. It was a mean, confrontational event that many have described as a low point for our nation. And then, at the end a gentlemen asked from his heart if either candidate could say anything good about their perceived enemy. It was a moment, very brief, where we found hope. Our addiction to negative emotions and judgment was buried for an instant as they broke the barrier, built a small bridge, and eventually shook hands.

I was taken by another politician interviewed on CBS’s “60 Minutes” this summer. The president of Argentina, Mauricio Macri made the following observation and comment:

“I think human history, for the most part, has been a cycle of hatred and revenge and indifference and callousness to the weak and vulnerable. But we’re experiencing an awakening. That’s what happens in America. Right when America is about to go under we get spiritual and moral awakening. I believe that in the 21st century we have to be open and must not put anymore ideological differences in front of the best solutions.
Do you agree that we have to work to reduce poverty, we have to defeat drug trafficking, that we have to improve the quality of our democracy? Yes? Well then let’s find which particular projects we can do? And let’s find ways to cooperate. The challenge will always be, ‘Will their rage be channeled through hatred and revenge or will it be channeled through love and justice?’

No doubt, our world is changing faster than at any other time in history. Population growth strains our resources. Climate change has resulted in a refugee crisis straining national boarders around the world. Advances in transportation and technology have resulted in a global economy and society that demands mutual respect for one another lest we destroy this beautiful gift of life. Our balanced response, moment by moment, is best served by whole hearted attention to that which is best for all with harm to none. A reliance on that which is bigger than what we ‘think’ we are is our first step to vitality, healing and ultimately, to love.

I’ve heard ‘stress’ defined as the distance or gap from where you are to where you want to be. We’re stressed to the extent we attach to wanting things as they were, or we push with anger and fear to what we want them to be. Our best solutions will come when we can simply sit together, when we can touch our shared humanity and apply the universal spiritual principles every major religion has been based upon:
Aim to cause no harm. To love one another as ourselves, even our perceived enemies.
To not take what has not been offered.
To respect one another, especially our elders who’ve traveled so far and have hopefully learned so much. Especially our children and their children who have so far to go. To respect means to listen, surrendering notions of being right.
To engage in non hurtful sexual conduct that comes from kindness to one another.
To use words that aim to heal rather than harm, to plant and water seeds of positive emotion and to refrain from watering seeds that grow the negative (fear, greed, ignorance).
To be aware of how our consumption practices influence us, others and the planet. To practice a life of awareness and moderation aimed to heal rather than deepen the wound.

These are intentions I grew up with as a Lutheran. They are practices and intentions world spiritual leaders promote through every religion. The mind is a restless thing. We’re by human nature forever drawn to our dissatisfaction. We can protest vote from anger, abstain from voting from our indifference and cynicism, or meet the moment in full awareness, stillness and faith, taking an action from the heart filled with a bigger hope and faith.

No matter what our circumstance, can we make space to find freedom in the moment, to touch stillness before thought, opinion, and fixed notions of right vs. wrong. Our forefathers called this respect and awe for that which is bigger than us ‘Divine Providence’. It feeds our sense of wonder, humbles us to the mystery of life, and fills us with the energy to meet each other from a sense of connection and dependence rather than us vs. them. To meet in the moment, full of vitality and a sense of well-being, curious to see what bubbles up as a better solution. Again, will we channel our current rage through hatred and revenge or will it be channeled through love and justice and the ultimate realization that we are not separate. We belong to each other and our kindness will determine our very survival and security.

I’ve just come in from one of my more challenging windsurf sessions. Winds varied from 5-35mph and it was hard to figure out what rig to use. I first went out on a large sail and had to sheet out (let go) wind in the sail. It was difficult to safely sail in the gusts, but worked great in the lulls. I then rigged down to a small sail and loved it in the gusts and bobbed trying to hold my balance in the lulls. I finally came in and rigged my middle sail to meet the conditions and couldn’t help but reflect upon Goldilocks and the Three Bears. So much of finding balance is listening deeply to discover the middle way. The sail I finally went out on was not a compromise. It offered me the best combination of power in the radically changing conditions. With careful listening, it was the safest choice and the most powerful choice for playing the balance of pulling in and sheeting out. It is amazing to see how much wind a large sail can handle when you sheet out. One time I did the Gorge Blowout racing in the Columbia River. We started in light winds and sailed several miles through narrow corridors where the wind was blowing 40 mph. To compete you needed to handle a mid-sized sail through parts of the river where people were on sails half your size. It took tremendous finesse and balance in knowing when to let go and when to pull in.

I’ve been windsurfing since 1981 and learned to kite board in 2004. The kite board bar took ‘letting go’ to a whole new level. With windsurfing, when you feel a gust you first pull in and then let go if the wind is too powerful. In kiteboarding you pull in to steer the kite and when a gust hits you let go and feel the kite load up. I broke several lines as my instructor yelled at me to stop pulling in. I had to unlearn a habit that was entrenched in my mind and body. I had to learn how to listen to a new piece of equipment as it played the elements. In both sports, the real power in my connection to the equipment comes from just below the navel. Both sports incorporate a harness that trains your body/mind to your ‘center’. One’s endurance and range of use are determined by sensitivity to this. With these sports, you slowly learn that you have brains in your feet that are being forever educated to the subtleties of pressure on a single surface and balanced performance that’s found in your middle.

I was recently at a blues jam discussing politics with the host during one of our breaks. He claimed that most Americans hold life positions that are somewhere in the middle. He believed our stagnation in government and apathy in public participation was due to a focus upon extreme positions. Many politicians speak of ‘reaching across the isle’, ‘finding a compromise’, etc. They don’t seem to recognize the power of ‘the middle’. When we can truly understand that there is a ‘better’ solution, that there is a ‘best’ sail to pick for the conditions, that their is a chair, bed, bowel of porridge that fits, we can get to the position of ‘win/win’. It requires an open, deeper listening that wants to explore what comes up. It means ‘letting go our position of being right’. It requires the wisdom to know when to pull in and when to let go, forever understanding that there’s something bigger at work in finding the best solution.

When we try to use force to push our sense of ‘rightness’ we make a mess of things. There’s a lot of rhetoric coming from some political factions calling for America to exert force in it’s relations with other nations. David Hawkins has written a lot about Power vs. Force and so much of our real power on the planet has come from the wisdom of knowing when to pull in and when to let go. Can you imagine all the lives that could have been saved had our leaders better known when to ‘let go’ during the Vietnam War or the Iraq War? There’s a delicate balance that requires dialogue and the wisdom to find a balance of decision rather than a stalemate. So what does ‘power’ really look like as opposed to ‘force’?

We find our power when we ask how we can turn our issue over to what is bigger than ‘me’, but still stay connected to me. We take on an attitude not of gain, but of depth, love and respect. It takes a radical humility to ‘let go’, to ease up on the ego. We stop competing to be better than another and just aim to be better than we were. The key to real power is to treat yourself as if you’ve already arrived to where you want to be. With this comes the aim to let go being right and embrace being kind. We listen deeply and let go thoughts that weaken us. With force, we naturally create a counterforce that weakens us. Power brings grace and strengthens us. Force is loud and aggressive. Power is silent. Force is always moving against something while power doesn’t need to move against. Force continually needs to be fed while power self sustains. Force makes demands while power is at peace. Force is constantly consuming and then destroys. Power is at peace. Force takes energy away while power gives life energy. Force associates with judgment while power drives from compassion and makes us feel positive. Force is polarizing, feeding on conflict. Power unifies, feeding awareness to our interconnection. Force needs an enemy and carries a high cost. Power has no cost. Force requires ‘proof’ and is argumentative. Power deals with intangibles. Force associates with sickness and what’s wrong. Power associates with health and gratitude.

Power comes from letting go our notion of being right or our grasping for some fixed knowledge. When we open to that which is bigger than us, to the divine mystery, we’re not setting one single circumstance that would betray us. Our greatest challenge is to stabilize ourselves in an unstable environment. When we shift from ‘our mind’ to the mind of that which is bigger than us (magnanimous mind) we breath out the problem of fear that’s been fed from our ego. We can then take in a breath of power, not weakness. When we openly explore “Why” we can’t help but touch the silence and divine mystery of the unknown. When we explore the “What” we can’t help but go deeper into understanding. When we’re aware enough to witness our restless mind we’re ready to see the tremendous benefit of pause, to say we’re willing to stop and breath every time we’re out of peace. It’s this deeper listening, a faith and hope, that informs us of the wisdom to pull in or let go. It’s where we find our balance in turbulent conditions. It comes from practice and the very core of being.